We all have them…… Margate Memoirs

Posted: June 7, 2012 in funny, happy, student life
Tags: , , ,

K so don’t even ask me what year it was….. All I know is that we had tight butts,perky boobs and our bodies had the remarkable capability to function solely (and very effectively really) on first a HEAVY and then a steady then heavy and again steady supply of……. (drumroll) alcohol!!! YES YES YES

SO HOW DID WE DO IT? I promise you the best micro biologists (or whatever they call themselves) in the world is still daily working very hard to understand the physiological dynamics of a student. We hardly ate anything decent…. didn’t get ANY sleep (do I need to elaborate?), partied till the sun came up in a very much polluted and smoke congested club where there is hardly any space to move, but we danced baby!!! Oh yes we did (at least we exercised right?). All of this whilst consuming any form of liquid sure to have you forget you’re name, sshllurrrr when you tried to communicate, fall around and occasionally end up passed out it a toilet cubicle….. Did that stop us????? Oh noooo….. nooooo nooooo. Nope the next night you’ll repeat the exact same routine with even more vigour and enthusiasm and maybe even except drinks from strangers.

You’d spend an entire holiday with a group of friends (strangers you met at the tattoo parlour) and maybe if you’re lucky remember their names when you return from holiday, although it’s a very slim chance. I remember one year we actually camped, yes in tents! Till this day I’m proud to announce that putting up that tent in my condition at that time is to this day one of my biggest accomplishments…. (you really had to be there to get it). Although the tent didn’t quite make it to the end… see on new years eve,midday,morning.. ok im not sure what time I miraculously made it back to my tent… (students get a free body gps unit implanted on the day you enroll at Varsity) HOWEVER… I did not succeed in waking up when someone broke into my freekin tent… no they didn’t use the front zip, they completely cut opened the whole side canvas (I kid you not) and stole a whole bunch of my very personal belongings… If some weren’t valuable I really wouldn’t have reported it to the police station on new years day with a huge headache, babbelas and repeated little vomits in my mouth whilst sitting next to one of 30 other victims all resembling my beautiful state of health identically… The real embarrassment only effectively sunk in, when the Officer on duty called my name out loud …very loud and announced that some of my belongings were found…. I went .. “please let it be my Oakleys” and he went “one medium-sized pink g-string with slogan reading; Find the little mouse house”…… Needles to say I had to walk to the front and collect my belonging in front of everyone… Including the very cute boy I passed out with the previous Wednesday…. Dane was it? No Dan or Drake… nope can’t remember!

I didn’t only loose stuff during Margate holidays ok? I was a rather innovative young entrepreneur if I might add. Let me explain:
Everyone knows the rules for news years eve…on Margate…
You wake up on the 31st, gulp down a Bloody-Mary or the mix of drinks in a cup left from last night, fix the black mascarra rings around your eyes, put on a new bikini, pack (oh sorry you didn’t really have anything to pack) and off to the beach as early as possible to A- dig your own mother of a hole in the sand or B-Paid someone to do it for you… Because if the rest of your buddies eventually make their way to the beach you’ll start the party in a freekin deep hole on Margate Beach…. (see how important social skills deveopment in the sandbox during pre-school years becomes)
You’re probably wondering where the entrepreneurial skills came in? Well well this is how I roll.
I weren’t exactly shy back then, so me and my sis had this brainwave (taking in consideration that most braincells were killed by then) invented the MARGATE BEACHFRONT TOLLGATE SYSTEM! Yes people! Two drunk students invented the TOLL SYSTEM…Taraaaaa!!!! How it worked….. You had to pay us, if you wanted to cross over to another hole… Ok I’ll come clean, at first it were a very profitable upcomming ENTERPRISE, then we started accepting “items” as payment which really also worked for me (collected a vast array of expensive sunglasses and Billabong gear). Then it kinda went downhill… the real liquidation (pardon the pun) of the company only happened when we started to accept kisses in order for the guys to pass through……. Sho! Best kissing booth eva!!! A clear example of how alcohol effects brain function as well as impaired vision) At least the income generated from Tollfee’s in our 1st financial quarter (that would be from 9am-11am on the 31st of Dec) went towards emmmm 25 “R5” McDonald burgers which lasted approximately 3 days… So it basically kept the company alive… hehehe

Then the time came, the countdown…… everyone frantically rushing around to stand next to who-ever ……. we all honored our Gr1 teacher by counting back from 10 to 1 (I have come across a many drunken student struggling with this part), we kiss.. we hug…. we cry… we promise to always keep in touch (NEVER HAPPENED) and then we all chained in, started swinging from left to right and sang:

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot
And auld lang syne?

Chorus:
For auld lang syne, my dear,
For auld lang syne,
We’ll tak a cup o’ kindness yet
For auld lang syne!

OH SO THIS IS THE REAL LYRICS???? See? You’re never to old to learn… Still a student at heart! 😀 Just with more WORK EXPERIENCE! hehehe

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Comments
  1. thefayday says:

    Reblogged this on thefayday.